Mighty Ducks, The (1992)

Okay, so maybe The Mighty Ducks is a formulaic, somewhat bland kiddie sports movie. We've all seen it before: poor and/or loser sports team gets paired with asshole coach who learns about teamwork and then they rise above their loser background to victory. I don't really care. The good thing about formula is that its familiar. The Mighty Ducks isn't going to wow anybody with its life lessons or its meticulous plotting, but what it does provide is good solid entertainment. If there's one thing I hate in movies, it's bad kid actors. Luckily, The Mighty Ducks manages to avoid most of the cringe-worthy pratfalls that befall films that rely on their younger talent. And surprisingly, the Ducks consist of kids of all sizes without drawing attention to it--nothing like today's Disney ilk. Emilio Estevez's performance as the hotshot with a lot to learn is characteristically blank, but you know what? I like him anyway. The film is not groundbreaking or fresh or any of these things. It's doggedly formulaic. But it's got a solid cast, clean action, a quirky team, a sneering villain, and some good funny moments. Simple, charming, and fun.

7/10

Soap box: While the critics slammed The Mighty Ducks into the boards back in 1992, it's a terrible shame that Disney is no longer producing anything like this. It's so focused on its franchises and its snarky rich brat brand of television that these days I would welcome even the cliched values of something like The Mighty Ducks over the rest of the crap Disney's slinging around.

In Time (2011)

In Time is Justin Timberlake meets Bonnie & Clyde meets Robin Hood meets cyberpunk. On paper this sounds pretty good but unfortunately the film thinks its way too clever. JT plays a ghetto punk in a distant future where time is currency that is somehow digitally tattooed on your arm to list your funds. An unusual encounter with a rich man with a death wish causes him to realize the system is rigged and that it's wrong, so he sets out on a quest to topple the 1%. Still sounds great on paper. JT's acting is fine. He's not great, but he's naturally charming. His co-star, Amanda Seyfried, on the other hand, is emotionless. Perhaps it was the character, but perhaps it wasn't. Cillian Murphy's timekeeper cop was fun to follow, but still nothing special. What is both the film's strength and weakness is its concept: time as currency. Huh, you think, that could be pretty cool. And the different things they do with their time/money, or the different styles of living associated with those who have all the time in the world vs those who don't are pretty cool--at first. The film's script becomes so saturated with cutesy and clever time "jokes" that it becomes annoying and loses its appeal. And as much as I'm for sticking it to the Man, I'm not for excessive preaching. Writer and director Andrew Niccol deserves a time out for this one.

I'm sorry.

5/10

Back to School (1986)

Back to School is a film made up of many amusing parts that don't quite fit together. Perhaps it was the weak, nagging performance of the son (Keith Gordon), or the hodge-podge of underdeveloped college caricatures that populate the picture: student anarchist (Robert Downey, Jr), wispy fun-loving lit professor (Sally Kellerman), fratters, jocks, etc. The only strong caricature was Paxton Whitehead's rigid business professor, the main antagonist. Despite all this, the film does make a few pretty amusing stabs at the university scene, the pretentious academia and intellectualism, and education vs practice. Lost in the mix are lessons about fatherly love, independence, and self-worth. The only thing that elevates the picture is Rodney Dangerfield, playing his usual character--faux-classy, crass, wise-cracking and bugging his eyes out every chance he can get. He's hilarious and nearly the only good reason to watch the film. The other good reason is a cameo by Kurt Vonnegut. I wasn't a huge fan of Danny Elfman's score, but I enjoyed his appearance with band Oingo Boingo during one of the party scenes. The film isn't bad, but the parts that aren't Rodney Dangerfield are serviceable at best and are barely held together by its flimsy plot.

6/10

Licence to Kill (1989)

Timothy Dalton's second and final entry into the Bond series improves upon his first. When Felix Leiter is injured and his wife murdered by the drug lord Sanchez (Robert Davi) on the day of their wedding, Bond resigns MI6 so that he may get revenge. He is aided by an ex-Army pilot (Lowell) and Sanchez' girlfriend (Talisa Soto). Both Bond girls (especially Lowell's character) are more active and more intelligent than most of the girls during Moore's reign, and the other supporting cast members (Cary-Hiroyuki "Shang Tsung" Tagawa, Benicio Del Toro, Wayne Newton) were a welcome sight. Q gets some field operative work, but unfortunately he's relegated to chauffeuring. The production quality was very polished, and the technical work was top-notch. For a film that takes place on boats and coastal cities, I was pleasantly surprised the producers decided to skip out on the trademark snack-break underwater fight scenes. The weakest link was Kamen's score which basically sounded like generic 80s action music does Bond. Licence to Kill is grittier and darker than its predecessors, but still without its moments of wit and class. It doesn't quite jump out at you like the best films of the series, but it is well-made and entertaining.

7/10

From Beyond (1986)

Hot off of Re-Animator (1985), Stuart Gordon and crew sought to make another Lovecraft hit with From Beyond. While the film has an interesting premise--a scientific device called the Pretorious Resonator allows interaction with a parallel dimension via stimulation of the pineal gland, causing the death of its creator and the suffering of other witnesses--the script had too many flimsy moments. At the center of the film is Jeffrey Combs, wonderfully playing his neurotic scientist character. The supporting cast is hit and miss: Ken Foree and Ted Sorel both give solid performances as Bubba the cop and Dr Pretorious, respectively. On the other hand, Barbara Crampton's psychiatrist character was irritating and inconsistent. She's unrealistically rash and irresponsible, even with the film's attempts to explain. The subplot involving her rivalry with the head psychiatrist at the Miskatonic Hospital was painfully unprofessional and a chore to witness. Additionally, I felt many of the elements of the film, especially those involving sex and bondage, were juvenile. What I did enjoy was the color aesthetic--saturated neon pinks and purples--harkening back to the Corman days of yore and the Thing-inspired special effects, with a generous supply of gibbering, shape-shifting masses and 80s lightning.

6/10